The yets will never come true
When people begin their alcohol and/or drug-filled journey they are usually not in the same place when they decide to get help. The ‘early’ days of addiction may even be filled with fond memories on how the substance actually helped them cope with some sort of trouble they were experiencing. However, the longer a person uses, the more they will lose. Unfortunately, this is Murphy’s Law of addiction.
One obstacle of a person getting help in the early throughs of addiction is the lack of identifying with those who had lost everything. These people had been arrested, they may or may not have been homeless, they may have lost their job or their family. One of the most insidious ideas that an addict or alcoholic has in early and even late stages of their disease is that it won’t happen to them. They haven’t lost their money, their freedom, their family or their job…yet. This is called ‘the yets.’ When an alcoholic or addict sees that the ‘yets’ are happening, this can be a big eye-opener and an identifying moment for the addict.
I will quit….tomorrow
The alcoholic or addict may not have begun using at the same pace they are using when they get help. Perhaps, early in their addiction, there seemed to be a few days/months/years of somewhat normalcy. You may have heard this term before, “He/she was a functioning alcoholic.” But the addict knows what they do behind closed doors. There may have been a point in their lives where they promised not to cross the invisible line in their head, “I’ll never use around my kids, before work, before I drive.” If someone is truly addicted it doesn’t matter who they are around or where they are at, they will eventually cross that invisible line. Once that line is crossed they will promise themselves and/or others that it will never, ever happen again. And they truly mean it, but tomorrow never comes. Their lives become a string of today’s marred by the promise to quit, the anguished apologies and the hope that tomorrow will bring something new. But for the addict/alcoholic, tomorrow may just as well be as far away as the sun. They will never reach tomorrow because for them it is too far away without help.
I can quit on my own..forever
Many people think that addiction/alcoholism can be cured by self-will, self-knowledge, and self-help. Not to negate those who have quit that way, but usually, it takes more than that. The addict will try and try again to quit only to pick up again a day, a week or a year or so later. If they attend self-help meetings they may have a better chance, but it is not promised. “I don’t need help,” may be one of the biggest lies they can tell themselves, “I can do it on my own.” The addict’s best thinking got them to where they are at right now, and if their best thinking is proving to themselves or others that they can cure the problem that has seemingly spiraled out of control on their own, then they may not be ready to quit. It is often said that a person’s ‘rock bottom is when they stop digging.’ And usually, the bumpy road of rock bottom is the only thing that makes them ask for help.
If you or someone you know is in search of an addiction treatment center, please give Wavelengths Recovery a call. We can help. Always confidential and always here for you and your loved ones.